The Girl Who Swallowed Her Tooth

Audra has had quite a day! Biting into a strawberry pulled one of her front bottom teeth out, just days after losing her first bottom tooth. Within two weeks, she's lost three teeth, and really NEEDS to lose the other top tooth, simply because it is now resembling a kernal of corn poking out of her gums ;P You see, she fell off of a kitchen chair when she was two years old, hitting her two top front teeth in the process. One tooth turned brown and died... we had it pulled. The other tooth is in for the long haul, I guess, and has stagnated at the ever so lovely yellow stage... Pictsweet yellow, as a matter of fact! But, back to the swallowed tooth... After telling her one of my fantastic tales, she may now believe that her tooth may be lodged in her intestine, spawning new little baby teeth and having a grand old time!

I showed Audra her picture on the previous posting and told her that people from all over the world could be seeing her cute face. At this moment, while she is SUPPOSED to be in bed, she is instead hunting down a cowboy hat to wear tomorrow, just incase I take anymore pictures. She thinks she is supposed to look like a cowgirl, since I wrote that we live on a funny farm. We really MUST live on a funny farm, because where else would I walk outside and see my six year old daughter squatting behind the poplar tree relieving herself (mind you, the poplars are no more than fifty feet from the back of the house... the house with four bathrooms). Hearing my fourteen year old son yell, "Audra! Get your pants back on!" is, quite simply, a common occurrence, for my daughter is an exhibitionist of the finest nature. Two years ago, at our last residence, she could be found buck naked in the front yard on a winter day. To her future husband... good luck with that... or perhaps... congratulations.

After hearing about my best friend's son breaking his arm on the trampoline last week, we thought, "Gee.... we should go buy a tramp!" -- which, of course, we did. (I can't let Annie have ALL the fun at the doctor's office) After less than five minutes jumping with her big brother (not recommended in the instructions from the manufacturer, I'll have you know), Audra was screaming and claiming that she broke her leg. Oh my... that lasted only another five minutes, when she figured out that she wouldn't be able to jump on the tramp anymore if she was complaining that she couldn't even walk. Glory hallelujah... it's a miracle... she hath been healed! So, no trips to the ER like my friend Annie...only second thoughts on what kind of a mental case I must be to enter into ANOTHER medium of entertainment for my kids, that they can argue over and kill eachother on. I guess I must have really needed something else for my kids to ask me about twenty jillion times a day... Wait! I seem to have forgotten that this is SUPER FUN! Sorry about that... memory lapse.